I was in a conference once and the presenter asked, "What do you think of when you hear the word 'Network'?" I spoke up and said, "LAN party." I got a few laughs and the presenter moved the discussion to what is often referred to social or business networking. I've heard people respond to the term networking with fear, trepidation, and even a little hostility. I can understand this mindset and at the same time I struggle with it. My wife would say it's because I'm more of a people person, and I don't think I can disagree.
My first experience with the term "networking" was at a two day training meeting with a company I didn't really like. In the end I was only with them a whopping three months. We finished at 11 am the second day, but they said they were going to have a "networking session" and that we should stick around for it. I skipped out and went to lunch with my father. It took me a while to realize that what they met by networking was to walk around and talk to people. To me that isn't effective networking, that's a room full of awkward conversation where everybody is thinking, "This person is meeting me to further their career." If I ever wanted people to network I wouldn't do it by saying, "We're going to network now! GO!" It kind of kills it.
My second experience with networking was doing an employment workshop with LDS employment services. Quick plug - The two day workshop I attended is one of the most useful things I ever did when it comes to finding new jobs and being competitive for them. If you need help - check out your local center. Anyway, they talked about identifying your network to help find potential employment. I liked looking at that a lot more than "building" my network. This use of networking is a common practice and is arguably one of the most effective ways to find jobs. I feel that if done well, this kind of use is a great way to use your network while not abusing the people that make it up.
To me networking is simply making new friends. I don't call it networking and don't like to think that I'm building a network. I prefer to meet knew people, trade ideas, learn new things, and help others when I can. I've worked in a variety of offices now and feel that those previous colleagues are now part of my professional network, but really they're just good friends who I know from work. Some of those have also become friends that I see outside of work. Some are only colleagues. I once interviewed for a job and even though I didn't get it, I came away from it with a good relationship with someone. Yes, I am glad to have someone who I can consider a friend in an office I would like to work in, but I didn't make the friendship with that intent in mind. I've used other opportunities to meet people and make friends at conferences and training meetings that I know could help me if I was looking to move in their direction, but the way to successfully "network" is identify it when you need it, not seek to build it as you meet people.
The Arbinger Institute wrote two books that discuss why "building" a network doesn't really work. While network is not the actual topic of the books, they discuss how it is possible to treat someone as something other than a person. Prior to reading the books (Leadership and Self-Deception and The Anatomy of Peace) I didn't think that I treated people as objects. I didn't put papers on their head or walk into them. But then I had a student come into my office at five minutes to quitting time with a complicated problem that only I could fix and needed to fix as soon possible. The student was no longer a person - they were a nuisance, an obstacle to by long weekend, someTHING between me and getting out of the office. Luckly, I was able to notice this and pulled my feelings in and was able to help them in the best possible way for them. The reason I bring this up? People can tell when you see them as a person and when you see them as something else. So if you're talking to people just to "build your network" you might not have much success. People will know that you're just talking to them to get something from them and it will hamper your communication and their willingness to help you.
So, my advice when it comes to networking? Build yourself a Local Area Network (LAN) and make some friends playing games.
My first experience with the term "networking" was at a two day training meeting with a company I didn't really like. In the end I was only with them a whopping three months. We finished at 11 am the second day, but they said they were going to have a "networking session" and that we should stick around for it. I skipped out and went to lunch with my father. It took me a while to realize that what they met by networking was to walk around and talk to people. To me that isn't effective networking, that's a room full of awkward conversation where everybody is thinking, "This person is meeting me to further their career." If I ever wanted people to network I wouldn't do it by saying, "We're going to network now! GO!" It kind of kills it.
My second experience with networking was doing an employment workshop with LDS employment services. Quick plug - The two day workshop I attended is one of the most useful things I ever did when it comes to finding new jobs and being competitive for them. If you need help - check out your local center. Anyway, they talked about identifying your network to help find potential employment. I liked looking at that a lot more than "building" my network. This use of networking is a common practice and is arguably one of the most effective ways to find jobs. I feel that if done well, this kind of use is a great way to use your network while not abusing the people that make it up.
To me networking is simply making new friends. I don't call it networking and don't like to think that I'm building a network. I prefer to meet knew people, trade ideas, learn new things, and help others when I can. I've worked in a variety of offices now and feel that those previous colleagues are now part of my professional network, but really they're just good friends who I know from work. Some of those have also become friends that I see outside of work. Some are only colleagues. I once interviewed for a job and even though I didn't get it, I came away from it with a good relationship with someone. Yes, I am glad to have someone who I can consider a friend in an office I would like to work in, but I didn't make the friendship with that intent in mind. I've used other opportunities to meet people and make friends at conferences and training meetings that I know could help me if I was looking to move in their direction, but the way to successfully "network" is identify it when you need it, not seek to build it as you meet people.
The Arbinger Institute wrote two books that discuss why "building" a network doesn't really work. While network is not the actual topic of the books, they discuss how it is possible to treat someone as something other than a person. Prior to reading the books (Leadership and Self-Deception and The Anatomy of Peace) I didn't think that I treated people as objects. I didn't put papers on their head or walk into them. But then I had a student come into my office at five minutes to quitting time with a complicated problem that only I could fix and needed to fix as soon possible. The student was no longer a person - they were a nuisance, an obstacle to by long weekend, someTHING between me and getting out of the office. Luckly, I was able to notice this and pulled my feelings in and was able to help them in the best possible way for them. The reason I bring this up? People can tell when you see them as a person and when you see them as something else. So if you're talking to people just to "build your network" you might not have much success. People will know that you're just talking to them to get something from them and it will hamper your communication and their willingness to help you.
So, my advice when it comes to networking? Build yourself a Local Area Network (LAN) and make some friends playing games.
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